April 30 2010

Break-Up Baggage: The X-bags

Posted Apr 30, 2010

Has there ever been a time where your significant other buys you a heartfelt gift that he’s convinced will fill you with tears of joy…only to be received with a smile that conceals tears of a different sort? You know, it’s that moment when he gives you the ill-fitting present with the sweetest intentions and those puppy-dog eyes. You love it (the gesture) and love him for doing it, but feel like he has n-o… clue. In Sex and The City language, it would be the instance when Big gives Carries a jewel-encrusted duck purse, and with utter confusion and shock, we all thought: “what the hell it that?”.

Well, as your relationship evolved, you gently coached him by skillfully and subtly (sometimes painstakingly) giving him hints that top on your wish list is a Vuitton Monogram Artsy MM and not some variation of a sexy nurse outfit. And one day, for the first time, his intentions were as genuine your delight when you unwrapped your gift and got what you were waiting for! Alleluia! You never thought he would get it, and, let’s be honest, thank Goodness for those savvy sales associates!

Fast forward a couple of years, and you both realized that maybe it wasn’t meant to be, deciding to part ways, but you’re stuck with the baggage (and fish bowl) filled with memories of your X. So what to do with this ex-cess luggage that’s become a burden on your shoulders?

One thing is certain: it’s important to make peace with the past in order to open space and welcome the future. It’s much more than the physical act of getting rid of the old; it’s a spiritual opening to all the wonderful life you still have to experience. It may be difficult, but strong women who are up to the challenge will succeed.

It’s perfectly natural to have an emotional attachment to things. However, to clean up the past is one of the most liberating and empowering acts that you can do. It’s a leap of faith forward and can even be a ritual, coinciding with Spring and a renewed sense of self and optimism for life. Don’t erase, replace! Replace negatives with positives and before you know it, your style is changing and you’re feeling adventurous enough to try a new hairstyle or color, and trade up your outfits and accessories. Embrace the transformation; it’s whole new you! Change is healthy, so get rid of your X-bags and move one-up on life’s alphabet to Y – for YES!